Emotional Intelligence

5 Key Skills in the Emotional Intelligence

Just like any other quality, even emotional intelligence has specific skills. These are skills that help you to stand apart from the rest. Having good emotional intelligence means that you can control yourself, your reactions, and your behavior without falling prey to negativity. So lets us look at the 5 Key Skills in the Emotional Intelligence

Self-Awareness

The ability to understand and recognize your own emotions is called self-awareness. It is considered to be the building block and foundation of emotional intelligence. The ability to understand and identify our emotions as well as have empathy for others is also part of self-awareness. We must learn how to manage, regulate, and express our feelings appropriately. Those who have high EQ’s are said to be intrinsically motivated. This means that those with high EQ are more bothered about the internal rewards instead of rewards like fame, respect, wealth, and so on. These are people who have personal reasons to accomplish their goals. They know their capabilities and self-worth and do not compromise on them. So, to summarize Self Awareness is

• The ability to recognize one’s emotions and the effects
• Knowing and understanding their limits and strengths
• Being sure of their capability and self-worth

How to improve Self-awareness?

Maintain a journal

One of the best ways to become aware of yourself is by having some ME time. During this time, pen down your thoughts, your fears, your strengths, and so on. The more you write, the more you become aware of yourself. Moreover, writing a journal also helps you to deal with your shortcomings and understand your strengths.

Learn to slow down

There are times when we let our emotions get the most of us. On the quest to self-awareness, you have to learn to slow down. Do not let emotions take control of you, your mind, and your heart. Sometimes situations are not under our control; however, our reactions are what we can control. So maintaining your composure and learning when and how to react is the key to self-awareness.

Self-Regulation

Self-Regulation is the ability to manage and monitor your behavior, thoughts, emotions, and energy states. It produces acceptable and positive results like learning, loving relationships, wellness and well-being, and so forth. Self -Regulation is also the ability to deal with stress and other founding factors that determine our behavior. To develop self-regulation, one must be able to maintain their focus, learn to relate to others, cope with stress effectively, filter their sensory stimulations, understand their emotional intelligence, and be aware of themselves. Self-Regulation also means that you have to stay in control and not rush into any decisions. In short, to summarize Self-Regulation

• It is about how a person manages disruptive impulses and emotions
• Learn the art of self-control
• Maintain a standard of integrity and honesty along with trustworthiness
• They take responsibility for their actions or conscientiousness.
• Self-Regulation is also about adaptability and accepting change
• It is also about being innovative and being comfortable with new information and open to new ideas.

How to improve Self-Regulation?

Know your values

Every person has their values, and they make no compromises on that front. You need to understand the values that you are not willing to let go at any cost. This is also known as the code of ethics. The best way to know your values is by spending time with yourself. It would be best if you thought about the choices you make that will not make you feel ethically or morally wrong.

Be accountable for your actions

It is very easy to pass the buck to someone else. The blame game is something that is the easy way out. Admitting your mistakes is not a sign of weakness but also be prepared for the consequences. As much as the consequences may be harsh, mentally, and emotionally draining, you have to go through it. The minute you start being accountable for your actions, you will see a difference in how you look at things.

Learn to be calm

It is easy to lose your temper or take stress; remaining calm is a big challenge. When you stay calm, you become aware of the challenging situation and your actions. When you handle things with a calm mind, you are in a better position regarding your actions and reactions. Moreover, keeping your mind calm helps you think correctly. As much as it may be difficult, however, it is important to be calm and composed.

Motivation

When we refer to motivation in emotional intelligence, we mean self-motivation. People who can motivate themselves are in a much better position to accomplish their goals. Keeping yourself motivated is not simple. It would be best if you had a primary target or goal that you have to focus on. Self-motivation requires consistency and the will never to give up. Every day, you have to make or find a reason to be motivated for the challenges ahead of you. Looking at the bright side of things and staying positive is one of the best ways to motivate yourself. In short, self-motivation is

• The ability to meet and improve excellent standards by having an achievement drive
• Self-motivation is being committed to yourself and to achieve your goals be it personal or professional
• When you are self-motivated, you can grab any and every opportunity that comes your way.
• You take the initiative and are ready to act whenever and wherever possible.
• Self-motivated people are optimistic and are persistent in achieving their goals even after setbacks and obstacles.

How to keep yourself motivated at all times?

Keep on examining what you are doing

Many people tend to give up their dreams and hopes. They take on careers that do not appeal to them. Such people always tend to live a monotonous life. Moreover, they start developing negative feelings and also expect their children to do the same. If you are not happy with what you are doing presently, you need to ask yourself WHY. Understand the root cause of the problem and work accordingly. 

Know where you stand

You need to know where you stand and when you should take the lead. A true leader is one who stays motivated and keeps the team motivated as well. When you know where you stand, it becomes easy for you to strategize a plan to reach your goal. It also helps you understand what techniques you would need to use to achieve your goal. 

Never give up hope

People who are motivated are the ones who never give up hope. They always remain positive, no matter how difficult the challenge is. These are people who can accept failure with a positive strive. It takes a lot of practice to remain positive in any situation. There will be times when you feel like giving up, but remind yourself that the best is yet to come. 

Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand somebody else by placing yourself in their shoes. As per studies, 90% of people with high emotional intelligence are top performers in their workplace. These are people who can understand their own emotions, feelings, and thoughts. They are not only better people but also good listeners. They also have the ability to be open and trust others. Such people have learned the art of accepting things rather than expecting things. 

How to improve your empathy?

Learn to put yourself in someone else’s shoes

It is easy to criticize or put somebody else down. It is challenging to put yourself in their situation. People who have learned the art of empathy always look at things from the front person’s perspective. They give their unbiased opinions keeping in mind both sides. We all go through different situations in life. If we expect people to understand our situation, we should learn to understand others’ situations. 

Body language is the key

Your body language can speak a lot about how you empathize with others. It also tells people if you are genuinely listening to them and understanding their situation or not. Wheater you are on a leadership role, an entrepreneur, or just an associate, the basics of being human is the same. It is not restricted to any cast, creed, gender, age, or social standing. 

Learn to respond to feelings

Every person has feelings, and you should learn to respect that. Appreciating people for they do, showing gratitude, and being grateful are all signs of a proper empath. You should find ways to make others comfortable, even when you are in the midst of a storm in your personal life. As much as you may feel frustrated, thinking about others is the key element of emotional intelligence.

Social Skills

People with high emotional intelligence have excellent social skills. These are people who can communicate as per the situation. They accept good and bad news with open arms. Such people are not only capable of leading a team but love a new challenge. People with excellent social skills can resolve conflicts and manage change diplomatically. They do not only make others do the work but also do the work themselves. Such people set the right example with the way they live. To summarize social skills, the critical points on this front are

• Communicate appropriately and clearly to send convincing and clear messages
• Learn to manage and initiate change
• Resolve conflicts with an unbiased mind
• Do not let your emotions influence your judgments
• Learn to resolve and negotiate disagreements in the right way
• Build relationships and praise people whenever you can. 

How can you build your social skills?

Learn to resolve conflicts 

If you want to work on your emotional intelligence, you must learn how to resolve disputes maturely. You should learn how to control your emotions and do not let your judgments be affected by it. While sorting conflicts, make sure you keep in mind the feelings and opinions of both parties. 

Work on your communication skills

Communication is the key to success in any situation. The more you communicate, the better it is. Never be afraid of standing for the right thing even if it means standing alone. Similarly, do not feel scared to speak up the truth. Be open to feedback and suggestions while putting down your thoughts and opinion. 

Praise others when you can

Praising people at the right time and place is not difficult. Just as how you would take the time to correct people, similarly, you should learn to praise them. When you praise people, you help them and boost their confidence. If you want people to be loyal to you, you should learn to appreciate them.